Hang On, Resolutions, I'm Coming

I was horrified when I looked at the calendar the other day.

It's the middle of January already, and the resolutions I was so excited about have been piling up in the corner while I've been putting out all kinds of unexpected fires during our first mayhem-filled week home. No, not any literal fires, though our smoke alarms did go off twice in the middle of the night (note to self: in humid places, the use of a humidifier can set off your smoke alarm), and frankly, I wouldn't have been surprised if a fire had been added to the list of items to deal with this past week. It was that kind of week.

Bad event #1: Lost my driver's license (yes, for those of you who are aware, the very one I was trying so desperately to renew in Utah when I found out that doing so would be impossible thanks to the new legislation effective Jan. 1 ... believe me, you don't want to hear my rant) along with a copy of Eliot's birth certificate (yes, with his Social Security number in plain view), I think in the plane or at the airport on our flight back. Lesson learned: put your IDs where they belong as soon as you're through security.

Solution: I now have in hand a temporary Oregon driver's license, with the permanent one due in the mail sometime next week, after taking and passing a written test and handing over $65.00 for a card I will "surrender" to the Utah DMV in just four months (again, you don't want to hear my rant), and I now know how to put Eliot's SSN on an identity fraud alert watch with one of the major credit bureaus. Add that to my to-do list for next week.

Bad event #2: Electric bill for the month of December. Okay, folks, we were GONE for all but 5 days of the billing period. Please explain to me how my bill is double what it was in November, when we were gone, our fridge was emptied and unplugged, we took no showers, did no laundry, and had our heaters turned down to just above freezing. Well, according to the customer service agent at PGE that I pleaded my case with, it's all very probable, and no, their rates have not gone up (I think she told me that five times in the course of our conversation). I can't say that the agent was rude or unfriendly, but she might as well have told me, "too bad, so sad." This one's gonna hurt the bank account.

Solution: We will be paying every cent of our December bill, along with every other disgruntled PGE customer who's bill doubled or tripled in December because of freezing temps. Oh, but the good news is that there is a local group that assists low-income families with their utility bills, and I can get an appointment with them ... in March.

Bad event #3: Apartment flooded. Good news is that the dozen or so chihuahuas above us that have been serenading us into the wee hours of the morning with their doggy mariachi for the last few months will be vacating their apartment in the next few weeks. Bad news is that their owner managed to flood her apartment and consequently ours this past week. Picture light fixtures looking like goldfish bowls, me frantically trying to clean up the downpour while not getting electrocuted (the water was coming through the light fixtures for the most part), while confused little Eliot looks on and says, "Mama, it's raining in here!"

Solution: The mess is cleaned up (oh, but I still need to empty the remaining water from my fish bowl, I mean hall light fixture), and the 20-year-old maintenance guy, whose efforts to survey the damage to the ceiling and electrical consisted of standing in my doorway and looking at the wet outlines of the sheet rock in my ceiling, did reassure me that they can "paint over the stains." So comforting.

Bad event #4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 ... well, still ongoing. Eliot isn't sleeping at night. Instead, he's screaming, or howling like a dog, as my neighbor described it, and waking up 10-12 times an hour. He does have a minor cold, but I think he's just having a hard time adjusting to being taken away from his Christmas wonderland at Grandma's. With one quick plane ride we took him away from his beloved grandparents, adoring aunts, best friend Poppy the dog, and all of the attention and praise a little boy could want. Now it's back to business as usual with boring old Mom, and sure enough, it's a little lonely around here. I understand all of that, I do, and I'm not insensitive to that as a mother. But Eliot, could we please address these issues after a good-night's sleep?

Solution: Benadryl, earplugs, white noise machine ... I haven't decided what my course of action will be, I just know I've got to get a good night's sleep soon or this zombie's gonna lose it. And no, I really don't believe in drugging my child (though I know plenty of people who do, and after the nightmare of a week we've had, I'm starting to understand why ...). In the mean time, my nightly prayer is, "Please let tonight be the night when Eliot sleeps again." Poor guy. Poor anyone within a two-mile radius of us. Chihuahuas included (see, I do have a heart).

So, between phone calls to PGE, the Social Security Administration, major credit bureaus, etc.; cramming alongside my 15-year-old niece for a driver's license exam, bailing buckets of water from my laundry room (okay, it's a closet, who am I kidding), and lathering on concealer so I don't look like the Bride of Frankenstein all day from the dark circles under my eyes, I haven't given my resolutions too much attention as of yet. Getting up early to exercise and watching my diet have given way to turning off the alarm completely and caving to usual habits of nervous/emotional eating. Working on my Personal Progress for Young Women has been replaced with considering it progress that Eliot only watched two or three (I'm not really sure, to be honest) hours of TV that day while I ignored him on the phone sorting out all these problems. The organizing I've wanted to get done and the leisure reading I've promised myself I'd make time for were replaced with getting my required documents in order and studying my DMV manual. Shall I continue to list my excuses/reasons for not starting off the new year with a bang?

RESolution: I promise to be less whiny in my next post. But yes, I do feel better now. And I will feel better tomorrow morning when last week is officially over and I can finally get down to keeping resolutions instead of finding solutions to unexpected catastrophes.

Oy, yoy, yoy.