I Couldn't Be Prouder ...

Of Grant, who finishes his SECOND year of law school this week! At the risk of understating or even sounding trite and cheesy, Grant really has worked so hard. This year has been a busy one; Grant's had to juggle school, work, family, student organizations, callings at church, but he wouldn't be Grant if he didn't do it all with a smile. I know I'm biased, but I think he's pretty amazing. We are ALL looking forward to a relaxing, fun summer. Forty-hour work weeks sound like heaven about now! It will be nice to be with family and friends in Utah and to get some sunshine and down time. Whew, just one more year to go ... you can do it, love!

And P.S. for those who are wondering ... we're off to Utah for the summer. Grant will continue to work for Moody-Brown & Brown, the firm in Provo that he's been with since last May (he's been telecommuting while we've been in Oregon -- hurray for technology!). To say that he loves working there would be an understatement. His boss, the other attorneys, and staff there are phenomenal, and he's just eaten up this great opportunity he's been given. It's so reassuring to know that Grant really does want to be an attorney (law school hasn't sucked all the life out of him ... at least not yet), and that he's very comfortable in the area he's chosen. Again, I am so proud of him!

Our New Baby

Isn't she beautiful?! We'll get to meet her in August, around the time we're back in Oregon to start school again, even though she's "due" to be "delivered" sometime in the next couple weeks. We can't wait to welcome this new addition to our family.

That's "Mama" to You, Son

Grant and I are choosing our words carefully these days. Eliot's picking up on LOTS of things we say, maybe even too many things ... like my name. This weekend, since Grant was around and calling for me and talking to me, Eliot picked up on the fact that Grant (naturally) calls me Monica. So it wasn't long before Eliot started calling me "Mon-ca," and he hasn't stopped since. I've noticed he is quick to resort to "Mon-ca" if he's not getting my attention fast enough. It's hard not to giggle when my child calls me by my first name, but I have this sick sense that allowing him to do so would be a major slide backward on my already slipping role as authority figure around here (since my two-going-on-twenty-year-old son seems to think he's the real boss these days). So, really, I'm trying to keep a straight face everytime Eliot says "Mon-ca" and quickly tell him, "No, Mama."

Wit's End

Oh, doesn't Eliot look so cute, sitting so nicely in his crib? You'd never know that this sweet, innocent child has given me a run for my money this entire week, especially when it comes to nap time. Granted, I am pushing my luck by still trying to get him to take two naps on some days when the kid is clearly ready for just one nap a day. But, because I teach piano lessons a couple days a week, I have to break up his one long nap into two shorter ones to have that window after school to teach my students. Ha. It's been a joke. Which is not only affecting my ability to teach piano, it's hugely affecting my ability to get the house packed up in order to be moved out and cleaned up ... by next Saturday! Anxiety levels are high around here with Grant in the middle of finals and Mommy in "moving mode," and my non-sleeper is not helping.

And it's not just that Eliot's not sleeping in his crib. He's also attempting to climb out, he's taking his clothes off, he's getting his legs stuck between the slats ... it's a three-ring circus in there! And I know what you're thinking, "Um, Monica, obviously he's bored. Give up already and stick in a video during your piano lessons." I promise I'm not that stupid or stubborn (or maybe I am?). The kid can literally be falling asleep in his high chair or completely zonked out on the way home from running errands, I mean totally exhausted, and when I put him in his crib, nothing doing. Today I even took him the children's museum and park and let him play from 10:00 until almost 3:00 (with no morning nap beforehand), and do you think he would take even a 30-minute nap? I just don't get it! I know he's tired. I know he needs his rest. I understand that he's probably sensing our stress and is anxious himself, but wouldn't you think after several days of not napping he'd eventually just crash?!

I really don't mean to gripe, gripe, gripe this week. But seriously, I am at my wit's end with my child. I love him dearly and try to respect his wants and needs, but the mommy in me knows that my child needs rest (because boy is he one basketcase by dinnertime when he hasn't slept -- which makes two of us), and I'm going to keep insisting on this one.

Any suggestions from you much wiser and more experienced mommies?

March Madness and April Sadness

The last two months have been more eventful that we would have wished.

March was, well, as the sports enthusiasts put it so well, "madness." Our little Eliot, who, for various reasons hasn't yet received the chicken pox vaccination, was exposed to chicken pox in our church's nursery mid-March. No big deal, right? Maybe just a little inconvenience, some time at home and away from other people. None of that would have been too bad except for the fact that I had planned to fly out and spend a week with my sister and her newborn baby Madelyn. I was so bummed and put off canceling the flight as long as I could, and when I finally did, I got off the phone and cried. If you don't know this about me already, I adore newborns. I think there is nothing sweeter and more sacred than holding those tiny, fresh-from-heaven little angels. And Mary is my closest sister in age -- just 15 months younger than me, the one I shared a room with growing up, the one who knows the good, the bad, and the ugly about me (and still loves me!), and I wanted so badly to be there to help her through one of the first of her sleep-deprived, overwhelming weeks of motherhood. I was really disappointed to have to cancel my big plans of wowing her with my freezer meals skills, scrubbing her house for her, helping her get on top of laundry again, and of course, hours and hours of "sacrificing" by holding sweet Maddy so Mary could get some rest.

Well, turns out I ended up going to Utah anyway, just in April instead of March as planned. Only my primary reason this time wasn't as light-hearted as the original plan. Yes, I got to see Madelyn and Mary, which was sweet and one of the best parts of my trip. But this time my purpose for traveling was to help one of my dearest friends through the loss of her infant son, Isaac, who was born six weeks early, with a condition called Anencephaly, a fatal condition in which his brain and skull didn't form completely, allowing him to live, though miraculously, for only a little over an hour.

Please don't misunderstand me; I am not putting this out there as "my" trial, because it isn't. It's Misty's and her family's. I've just been a friend on the sidelines, helplessly watching it all happen, my heart breaking at the thought of what my dear friend has been asked to endure, on top of her life that has already known unimaginable pain. I went and supported and hugged and cried. I "met" Isaac (who is beautiful, by the way) through the gorgeous photographs Misty was able to have taken of him. Through it all I have to admit that I wasn't much help. What words of comfort could I give? I certainly couldn't empathize. I couldn't pretend to imagine how my sweet friend must be feeling, because I have no idea. I knew that as much as I tried to help and provide company and love, at the end of the day I would go home to my "normal" life and not have to live with the agonizing pain of having lost a child. That will be and is Misty's burden to bear. I don't know why this happened to such a whole-hearted, devoted, compassionate mother. I don't know how this works into God's plan and how He can allow such things to happen. What I do know for certain is that March was madness and April has just been sad and hard.

But. What I also know for sure is that, as much as I don't understand Him sometimes, there IS a God in heaven. He understands this all perfectly. He knows why Misty has to experience this ultimate sacrifice of giving up her son. Because He knows exactly how that feels. And because of His Son's sacrifice, and I know this for certain, Misty will have her baby again. Her very appropriately named son, Isaac, will continue to live, he will be made whole, and she will see him and embrace him and be granted the opportunity to mother him in the life to come. That is my comfort and my solace. It was a bittersweet experience to attend Isaac's funeral the day after Easter. From now on I will probably celebrate Easter a little differently, maybe with a little more tenderness and reverence for what that holiday really means. It will mean a little more to me from now on when I consider that I do "know that my Redeemer lives ... what comfort that sweet sentence gives."

Two Years Ago This April ...

I looked like this (7 months pregnant with Eliot) ...

... and I fell in love with Oregon the first time I saw it.

"Coranki"

... never heard that word before? I hadn't either until it was the security word I had to type in on a friend's blog after posting a comment. I think it's the perfect word to describe Eliot this week -- CO-RANKI!!!!!! (aka CRANKY!!!!). Poor thing has something going on with him, we're not sure what since even the doctor couldn't find anything, but we're pretty sure it must be those rotten two-year molars. The other night he was running a whopping fever, and we had the worst night's "sleep" we've had since he was a newborn (I know, I really shouldn't complain since Eliot's spoiled us by generally being a champion sleeper). In the meantime Eliot's getting extra doses of "loves" and Tylenol, and we're getting extra doses of whines and tantrums. My daily mantra? "It's just a phase, it's just a phase." (Right, Laura?)

Sweet & Heavenly Conference Tradition

I've always wanted to have a tradition to make general conference weekend really special. I've wanted to come up with a special breakfast or meal to enjoy that would help our family really look forward to that time together at home, listening to the words of the prophet, apostles, and church leaders. My only rule? It had to be SIMPLE. I didn't want to detract from the purpose of conference or take away the relaxing aspect of the weekend with some meal that takes elaborate preparation. The answer? Overnight sweet rolls. Last conference I tried an overnight cinnamon roll recipe from a good friend -- yummy! And this time, we did overnight pull-apart breakfast bread (commonly known as "monkey bread"), and it was SOOOOO easy and super delicious. Sure, a little indulgent, especially when paired with rich and creamy chocolate milk, but I figure a couple times a year it's okay.

The recipe for this bread, which I really couldn't get over how easy it was, comes from my good friend Brittany, the source of some of my best and, in her words, maybe not so "virtuous" recipes!

Monkey Bread:

• 18 frozen rolls (i.e. Rhodes)
• 1 box non-instant butterscotch pudding
• 1/2 cup butter or margarine, melted
• 3/4 cup brown sugar
• cinnamon to taste

The night before you want to serve, place approximately 18 frozen rolls in a buttered Bundt pan. Sprinkle one package butterscotch (non-instant) pudding over rolls. Mix 1/2 cup better or margarine (melted) with 3/4 cup brown sugar and cinnamon (to taste). Pour sugar/butter mixture over rolls topped with pudding mix. Cover with plastic wrap and let raise at room temperature overnight. Back at 375 degrees for about 30 minutes. If they brown too fast, cover with foil the last 10 minutes. Turn out on a plate and enjoy!

Variations:

• Add 1/2 to 1 cup chopped pecans
• Top with cream cheese frosting

Spring Has Sprung

Here are the first of our Spring Break photos. What a perfect way to start. I LOVE Spring in Oregon! Everything seems to bloom, the air is always fresh and fragrant, and all of the plants and flowers are lush and dewy and fresh. It's wonderful. These shots are from the Portland Temple grounds, well except for the tulips, which I took at the "Tulip Fest" in Woodburn ... or should we say non-tulip fest. We went on the day it opened, and the only tulips in bloom were the potted ones you see in the picture. Click on the above "Tulip Fest" link to see what it will look like pretty quick here ... amazing. Can't wait to go back and check out the real deal.

And these last couple shots -- some of my favorites. I know that a lot of the happiness on Eliot's face was due to his not being cooped up in the car anymore, but I absolutely love the wonder in his face. He has always loved being outdoors and going on "nature walks" and seeing flowers, trees, birds, etc. What sweet memories caught on camera.

A "Wicked" Spring Break Preview!

We are winding down after the few fun-filled days we spent with two of Grant's sisters and my cousin Becky. There are lots of pictures to upload and a whirlwind of sights and adventures to blog about, but one of the highlights for me was getting to see Wicked in Portland. It was my first time seeing it, and Grant's first time seeing a Broadway production, and it was OUTSTANDING!! We loved it and can't stop thinking about it or the music. The actress who played Elphaba (the Wicked Witch of the West) was particularly phenomenal. We unfortunately had an understudy for Glinda's role, but she did a really good job, too. What an amazing excursion -- definitely a break in the normal law student family "norm"! We're especially grateful we got to see it here because tickets to the summer showings in Utah sold out in four hours. We didn't even get a chance to think about buying tickets. Lucky for us tickets were easier to come by in Portland.

My Heart Is in Spain Today

Today my heart is in Spain. Today "my" MariCarmen, a beautiful and amazing young woman I taught on my mission, got married in the Madrid temple to a young man who, from what I can tell from correspondence with MariCarmen and pictures, is the perfect match for her. Today is one of the days that you live for as a missionary. Whether a day like today comes during your mission or many years later, it is one of those days that makes every moment of sacrifice and difficulty worth it.

MariCarmen and her (now husband!) Roger.

MariCarmen and her family were one of the greatest blessings of my mission. At the beginning of my mission, I prayed fervently that I would be able to teach an entire family and see them receive the gospel. That kind of experience isn't especially typical in Spain, but I knew it was a worthy goal, and my heart longed to "find" and teach an entire family. MariCarmen and her family were the round-about answer to that prayer. MariCarmen's entire family had been long-time members of the Church, some of the "pioneer" members in that area (Spain was not open for proseletyzing until the late 1960's because of the influence of Franco), but then her family became inactive when MariCarmen was seven years old -- the year before she was supposed to be baptized.

Ten years later, as new missionary in Jerez de la Frontera, Spain, I met MariCarmen and her family. They were one of our "less-active" visits, but for more than a few sets of missionaries, Sisters had been teaching and working with MariCarmen. Visits with MariCarmen were my favorites -- every Saturday night we would meet with her. She and her family were so gracious and kind and funny. And I could tell right off that MariCarmen had a testimony. That testimony took a while to solidify -- much to the heartbreak of more than a few sister missionaries, I know -- but when she was ready to take the step forward and be baptized, I happened to be one of the lucky ones to be a witness to that great event. My companion, Hermana Olsen, and I felt so privileged to have met and "taught" MariCarmen. We prayed non-stop that MariCarmen's family would come back into activity as the result of MariCarmen's baptism and powerful spirit and testimony. It wasn't an easy process -- there was plenty of adversity and challenges, but much of MariCarmen's family -- including her father who at one time had been a Branch President -- returned to activity. The most joyous day of my mission -- my very last Sunday in the mission field, Mari Carmen and her family surprised me by traveling almost two hours to the area I was serving just outside of Sevilla, and attended church with me. It was overwhelming to take up an entire row in the chapel with them, to see her father in a white shirt and tie, and most of all, to see them, one by one, take the sacrament. It was a powerful moment to realize that that very moment was the answer to my prayer -- I had been a part of bringing a family into the church. They were just returning back after a long absence.

Me with MariCarmen, her brother Israel, and parents, Manuel & Nani, the last Sunday of my mission, when they attended church with me as a complete family.

I thought my joy was full that last Sunday of my mission. But then six months later I learned that MariCarmen and her family were to be sealed in the Madrid temple. My heart longed to be in Spain on that day, to see that beloved family dressed in white and joined together for eternity. Then, a few years later I learned that MariCarmen was going to serve a mission herself. And again my heart longed to be with her in the Madrid temple, where she would again make sacred covenants as she prepared herself for missionary service in which she would bless people of her native country in the Madrid, Spain, mission.

And again, my joy is full, and my heart longs to be in Spain. To be at that remarkably beautiful temple, to see beautiful MariCarmen dressed in white again (like she was over eight years ago when I saw her get baptized), to see her family there, joined together in celebration of covenants that will bind them together as a family now and forever.

My cup overfloweth.

Call Me Obsessed ...

I am an obsessed aunt and proud of it. Wouldn't you be?! I got to "see" Madelyn in person last night on the webcam and I am in love with that little girl, screechy cry and all! Counting down the days til I get to fly out to Utah and snuggle that little bug as much as she (and her mommy and daddy) will let me!