Squares and Prayers for Max

Our little friend Max Kelly had open heart surgery last week. He's not even 3 1/2 years old, and this is his third surgery!  We think he's pretty awesome, and his family are some of our dearest friends we met while living in Oregon.  They mean a lot to our family, so Max's surgery has been a big concern for us.  Eliot has been asking a lot of questions about Max and his surgery, and we've done our best to answer in a way that a 4-year-old can understand.  Eliot's pretty sharp and has picked up on things and has been very concerned for Max.  As a result, he has been praying for Max daily, that he would be brave for his operation and that the doctors will "fix his broken heart and put him back together again."

We were honored to be asked to do some special things for Max.  We got to make a quilt square for a special quick Max's mommy Mary made for him for his hospital stay.  If you know me, you know that sewing is a daunting undertaking for me, and I am definitely not a quilter, so I fretted over this project!  But one night I thought of this idea -- to make a "Corduroy" quilt square.  Max's favorite color is green, and Corduroy is one of our favorite children's books at our house.  The phrase from the book when the little girl tells Corduroy that she likes him just he way he is, but that she would be more comfortable (when she fixed his strap) seemed like the perfect idea for our quilt square for Max.  It was a pretty rough job, since I sewed it by hand, but it was so much fun putting it together.  We love Max and are so happy to be able to support him and his family in little ways during this major event in their lives.

 

Just like when Max had his open-heart surgery as a newborn, Max's parents called upon friends and family to send paper hearts to decorate Max's hospital room.  Here are the Dickinson family contributions:

A Spiderman heart from Eliot telling Max that he's Eliot's "super hero," a Cars heart wishing Max a "speedy" recovery from our family/me & Grant, and a heart with Zachy's hands telling Max his loves him "this much!"  We're excited to see pictures of Max's decked out hospital room to see if we can spot our hearts in the hundreds that will no doubt be there.

In Training

I'm just three weeks away from my half marathon.  This one is the Utah Valley Half, which starts around the turnoff to Sundance up Provo Canyon and ends near Center Street and University Avenue in downtown Provo.  I'm feeling pretty good about my training so far.  No injuries, keeping up fairly well with my schedule thanks to Eliot's preschool and Zach's nap schedules.  I'm not as quick as I was training for my last half, but considering I had a baby less than a year ago, that's probably to be expected!  I chose a training schedule that would have me runner longer distance runs than I did last time (last time the longest run I had before my race was a 9-miler, and I did not feel prepared enough).  I've already run my 10-miler, and 11 miles is on the docket for this weekend.  I have had to do a lot of my training for this race on my treadmill, which is convenient, but not my favorite.  I prefer running outdoors, especially for long runs.  But I'm mostly just grateful to be running again.  It feels good to be pushing myself.  I never would have believed running would end up being one of my passions (I used to HATE the required runs in junior high!), but I think there is nothing better than how I feel when I'm cooling down from a good, hard run.

My only comments on the photos: Loving my Brooks running shoes -- they're so light!  And yes, I seriously use a paper schedule (I do love putting a checkmark next to a completed task!), mostly just because I have yet to find an app I really like. I tried the half marathon one on Run Coach Pro and didn't really care for it. I've liked Strava, which tracks distance/time, but what I'm really hoping for is an app that streamlines customized schedules, tracking distance and time, music playing/streaming Pandora, and a running log all into one. Please send me suggestions if you know of a good one!


The biggest difficulty so far with training for this race has been fatigue.  With our move coming up and lots of stuff weighing on my mind, I have been suffering from pretty bad insomnia.  It's not unusual for me to toss and turn until 2 or 3 a.m. and then have to drag myself out of bed a few hours later.  Not the best conditions for pushing your body to its limit with intense training!  Somehow, my running is actually invigorating me, but the closer I get to my race, the more I'm noticing how worn out my body feels.  Here's hoping I can hang in there over this next month and get this race and our move out of the way so I can finally rest!

Mother's Day 2012

I loved celebrating Mother's Day this year with my two little boys together.  They are rascally, crazy kids, but I love being their mom!

Oh, they melt my heart!

Eliot is in the funniest, goofy stage right now.

This is the essence of Zach. Getting that child dressed/diapered makes me completely insane.  I love these little outfits, but it is torture for us as parents (it seriously takes both Grant and me) and for Zach to get it on and off. I love this child, but I greatly fear what the future holds for us two hard heads!

Eliot insisted on getting a head shot of me, and I gladly accepted.  He always makes me look good ... maybe because he can always draw out my best smile!

And of course we needed one of him in a silly pose.  Love this kiddo.

...

Eliot's preschool teacher did an awesome Mother's Day program for all the moms.  Grant's mom kindly took time off work to attend with me.  It was such a cute program!

 My cheeser before the program started.

 "I love you a bushel and a peck.  A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck."

Eliot's first time dancing with a girl!  His partner Ashley has been the topic of many of our lunchtime talks ... and now I understand why!  It was so darling to see him spinning her and dancing with her!

It was a wonderful few days of celebrating being a mom.  This is what I've always wanted to do with my life.  It's harder than I ever imagined and better than I could have dreamed.  My boys took great care of me, and I appreciated the Belgian waffle breakfast, the flowers, cards, handmade gifts, bike tuneup and new running watch ... thanks to all my sweethearts.  I couldn't love you more!

For All You Moms ...

This commercial made me cry the other night while I was watching TV.  It just sums it up so well, especially for the phase of life I'm in right now with Mr. Zachary.  Happy Mother's Day to all you moms out there (present and future).  You're doin' okay.

Thanksgiving Point Tulip Festival, 2012

 

 

 

In summary: beautiful sunny day . not quite like Oregon's (not bad, just different) . wrestling boys in the grass . 4-year-old happiest playing in the stream and sandbox @ the children's garden . blueberry Italian ice was awesome . yep, Zach still hates strollers and being strapped in (ended up pushing our stuff in the stroller and carrying Zach ... isn't that how it always seems to go?) . got us excited to live in Lehi . will definitely come back next year . perfect photo for Mother's Day cards (first ones turned out best, went downhill from there ...) . wonderful spring day with my boys!

Poor Little Zachers ...

Our little Ree had to be hospitalized last week for Bronchiolitis (an illness from a nasty virus like RSV, though Zach didn't have the RSV virus).  What started out as a mild cold caught from big brother turned nasty in a matter of hours, and his wheezing and whistling took us to the pediatrician's office Tuesday afternoon. When we couldn't bring up his oxygen levels through treatments in her office, it was determined he would have to go to the hospital, and since he had to be on oxygen, we had to be transported by ambulence.  Zach was in pretty bad shape through the early morning hours, fighting for each breath and struggling to get comfortable enough for some much-needed rest. But somehow he made a miraculous turn-around and improved enough that the doctors sent us home around noon the next day. I fully attribute Zach's quick recovery to the priesthood blessing he received from Grant and his grandpa Dickinson just before being whisked away in the ambulence. I'm so grateful to have immediate access to that healing power in moments of need like this!

The EMT getting Zach all hooked up in the ambulence. The two firefighters who assisted us were so wonderful and sweet with Zach.  I didn't know this, and you can't necessarily tell from the picture, but when a baby rides in the ambulence, he rides in his car seat strapped to a gurney.

 

Z with his oxygen tube "stickers," which, I have to say, did not hold that tube on well enough!  This determined babe ripped it off with ease.  The oxygen tube was the most uncomfortable and frustrating part of our stay.

 

Sweet baby, looking and feeling so much better the next morning.

Our little miniature hospital patient behind bars.  I think hospital cribs ("cages" is more like it!) are the saddest invention ever!  But the little jammy bottoms they put him in were so sweet!  

 

I finally let him out of his pen to crawl around.  And when I did, he went straight to the door and banged on the glass, as if to say "get me outta here!"  Because he had a serious virus, we were in confinement, which meant Zach couldn't leave, and all the doctors and nurses who came to check on him wore masks and paper coverings.

What a difference a day makes!  This is Zach about 15 hours after he was admitted.  A little rest, suctioning, oxygen, bottles, and a bath made such a difference! 

Our sweet Ree handled his hospital stay like a champ.  We love him and are so glad he's recovering!

Sneak Peek ...

We're set to close on this beauty on May 31. Yes, you read that correctly.

We're buying a home!

It was love at first sight when I came across this home. It took a little more convincing for Grant, who was naturally concerned about the commute (the home is in Lehi, about a 30 minute drive -- on a good day -- to his work in Provo), but when we walked through it for the second time to see if it was the right fit for us, we both felt so peaceful and excited about it. The best word to describe this house is lovely. It is 100% my style. I love the rock work on the exterior, the landscaping is gorgeous, the paint colors and decor are exactly what I would choose, there are even peach and apple trees and a row of raspberry bushes out back, and, very important to me, a beautiful view of Mount Timpanogos ... perfect, perfect, perfect! There's a huge, fenced-in yard and covered sandbox for the boys, a beautifully updated kitchen and a craft/exercise room for me, a fantastic master with walk-in closet and jetted tub in the bathroom, which, I was surprised to learn, was a big plus for Grant, who has always dreamed of an amazing master bedroom suite, and for the first time in our married life, a full, two-car garage!

June is a big month for our family, so we'll move in slowly, but hope to be settled by July. Please come see us when we're in! We'd love to grill for you and roast marshmallows over the fire pit I promised to get Grant when we bought our first home. If you get a hankering to see a great rodeo or visit the roller mills where Kevin Bacon danced his heart out in Footloose, we'll be happy to take you, since it's all in our backyard! Yee-haw! But seriously, we are very pleased with this major step forward in our life and can't wait to finally plant some roots and live in a home we won't have to move from for several years. Miracles do happen!

Project: "Snapshot of a Mother"

I am undertaking a little project. I am going to start documenting my day-to-day life as a mother. I'm going to capture the fun, the creative, the routine, the ordinary, the dirty, the difficult. I'm going to snap pictures of breakfast, nap time routines, piles of laundry, trips to the market and library, blowing bubbles, finding bugs ... why? Because someday, though I may not believe it most days of the week, I'm going to miss this. Yes, I'll be grateful for the pictures of Christmas mornings, birthdays, and other big moments, when everyone's dressed just right and I've outdone myself as a "supermom," and all is right and happy with the world. But what about the everyday moments? The ones we live over and over again? The ones that are my life and my existence and my identity? I think that I'll remember them forever because they're so much a part of who I am and what I do long day in and long day out. But I'm coming to realize this is all so fleeting. My baby, whom I swear I delivered yesterday (didn't I?!), is quickly sneaking up on his one year mark. My first is practically headed off to Kindergarten. So before I blink again and it's gone, I want to capture those moments. The everyday, the sometimes "will they ever end?!" moments. Because for good for bad, yes, they will end. And I want pictures and journal entries to document it. Though it seems so mundane and long and tiring now, it is precious, and it is temporary, and I want to hold on it to is some way, somehow.

Driving this little project are thoughts like these, from people I admire and who have caused me to think on this time as precious and fleeting:

"Recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction." (Elder M. Russell Ballard, Daughters of God, Ensign, April 2008)

My friend Erica, commenting on the difficulty of raising her children away from family:

"When it is just you caring for your children 91 daytime hours a week, week after week, it becomes easy to lose the freshness, the vision of who they are. Slowly they cease being little spirits I’ve been entrusted with and start feeling like charges I’ve been burdened with. Thankfully, when I get to this point, it often coincides with a vacation to see family, and I begin to see my boys with the freshness that their grandparents see them with." ("How I See My Kids Anew," on Let Why Lead, April 16, 2012)

And this, which has become one of my favorite quotes about motherhood:

"A mother relating to her child in the private intimacy of her home, with no audience but unseen angels, is the predominant influence for all that is good and decent in the world." (George D. Durrant)

And if you have a minute, watch this sweet testimonial from an author who wrote a whole book about the fleeting nature of motherhood.

With those thoughts in mind, this is the first of my "Snapshot of a Mother" entries. It is real, it is untouched. The photos aren't my best, but they are sweet, and with them comes a tender memory of days now gone. I love how I feel when I see these pictures, which is exactly what I hope to capture through this photo journey. You'll forgive me if I don't share all my photos and entries with you. Some along the way may be just mine to keep, but here's the first of those I'll share. When I decided to start this project, I knew that these pictures would be the perfect ones to start things off.

Mornings with Eliot leading up to Zach's birth ...

I'm not sure at what point in my pregnancy with Zachary this little tradition started, but Eliot would come wake his sleeping mama every morning with a book to read. He usually had a blankie and a special snuggle friend in tow, as well (you can see his blue "Snugglebear," his most special friend, in his hand in these photos). I loved those moments when it was just me and my first-born, reading together, laughing, and snuggling in my bed as the sunlight trickled through the window. I asked Grant to take these photos because I wanted to always remember those special final moments when it was just Eliot and me. It was just "Eliot and me" for almost four years before we welcomed another baby into our home, and this little tradition was the perfect way to close that special chapter in my life as a mother. Though I slightly shudder at my appearance in these photos -- with my un-makeuped, double-chinned pregnancy face and "flabby" arms, I LOVE the memories and the feelings they captured.

My Easter Buddies, 2012

Zach's first Easter ...

Egg hunt dominated by Eliot ...

Easter this year also included: a special "Easter Walk" with Eliot to find and talk about symbols of Easter, the boys in matching Easter suits & ties (pictures coming soon), dinner with family, Monica won the "golden egg" in the "big kids" egg hunt, Eliot pouting about Mom winning the big prize, watching "Hop" and eating treats with Eliot, too much candy in our house, and leftover boiled eggs for a week.

Happy Easter

I recently received an e-mail with a link to this beautiful new song by Shawna Edwards, who wrote the Christmas song "Do You Have Room?" that I've shared in the past. What a lovely reminder of the purpose of this Easter season.

Provo Tabernacle Temple: Foundations

At the Provo Tabernacle, April 2012

(Eliot 4 1/2, Zachary 9 months)

Our little family is watching with great anticipation the building of the "Provo Tabernacle Temple" (what we're calling it; not sure what the official name will be). The area of south Provo where the former tabernacle/future temple stands is where our life began as a married couple. Grant and I lived in that very humble neighborhood for nearly five years, from when we were newlyweds in a scary little apartment where the Backman metal foundry, railroad tracks, and freeway overpass all intersect. It was a pretty shady place to live, that's for sure, but it was a wonderful, memorable time in our lives. There we were, as young newlyweds, high on life and full of hope, both fresh off our missions and ready to be put to work in one of the most poverty stricken neighborhoods of Utah. And put to work we were! We got to work right in the trenches, me as the Gospel Principles teacher, ward missionary, Young Women camp director, and eventually as a counselor in the Relief Society Presidency, Grant as Ward Mission Leader, Employment Specialist (a big calling in that particular ward, where a large percentage of the members were facing severe economic hardship), and then as counselor in the bishopric.

To say that we loved our time in that ward would be a gross understatement. I cannot think of that time in my life without filling with emotion and being so grateful that Heavenly Father led us to an area where we were truly needed. It was the best thing that could have happened to us as a newly married couple. To this day, I am convinced that those circumstances, though not ideal as far as safety, aesthetics, or convenience were concerned, were absolutely ideal for building the foundation of our marriage and family. We got to serve and work in an area where most of the members of our ward were truly downtrodden. And we got to do so alongside some of the most Christlike, pure-hearted people I have ever met. I cherish our memories in the Provo South Stake.

One of the tender blessings of living in south Provo was getting to attend stake conference in the Provo Tabernacle. There we were uplifted and encouraged to press forward by President "Buddy" Richards, our humble and magnificent stake president, who was a childhood friend of my mother's. At Christmas time, our stake was blessed to host the Living Nativity outside the Tabernacle walls, and Grant and I were fortunate enough to portray Mary and Joseph in 2005. Some of the most prized memories of our first years happened right in that humble little pocket of Provo. So it seems only fitting that our family, now growing with two little boys, will get to watch the tragically burned Tabernacle be converted into a temple. We feel deeply that this temple will be such a gift to that troubled yet wonderful little area of southwest Provo. We hope that its presence will be a light and a blessing to the people there. We plan to take our children for many more photo ops and teaching opportunities at that sacred site. Because, after all, that holy ground is part of the special place where the foundation of our family was built. We hope that our children will feel a respect and reverence for that place. It means so much to Grant and me. I will never forget when President Monson announced the plans to convert the Tabernacle into a temple at General Conference. Grant and I were both speechless and looked at each other with tears in our eyes. Our hearts are filled with joy to watch this miracle be built in a place that is so dear to us.

I'm so glad we caught this in time. This is the foundation of the original Provo Tabernacle. Apparently, a different one was there before the current one was built. You can see a picture of what it looked like below (on the "Provo Tabernacle" sign). The Church has had it excavated to dig up artifacts and do some research, but I guess they're going to cover it up again (we think they should have turned it into step-down garden, but I don't think they're taking suggestions ...)

We're excited to watch "our temple" be built up from this historic site that means so much to our little family!

(Side note: the gentleman you can see in this picture was such a fascinating person! He's a real history buff and photographer, with a special interest in photographing Church historic sites. He said he has over 9,000 photos of the Mormon pioneer trail! Amazing!)

"The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound; ... to comfort all that mourn; To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; ... And they shall build the old wastes, they shall raise up the former desolations, and they shall repair the waste cities, the desolations of many generations. ... And their seed shall be known among the Gentiles, and their offspring among the people: all that see them shall acknowledge them, that they are the seed which the Lord hath blessed. I will greatly rejoice in the Lord, my soul shall be joyful in my God; ... For as the earth bringeth forth her bud, and as the garden causeth the things that are sown in it to spring forth; so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to spring forth before all the nations."

-- Isaiah 61:1-4, 9-11

Jumpin' for Joy

This little video pretty much sums up what Eliot's into right now: his trampoline and his "Maddie's Mix CD" (music he got as a party favor at his cousin's birthday party). I would say those things are a part of our daily life right now. Jumping on his trampoline to one of "Maddie's Songs" (usually one from the newest Muppet movie soundtrack) has even become part of our bedtime routine. To which I say, "Whatever wears him out!" I do have to say that the trampoline, which Eliot received as a Christmas gift from his aunties, has been a wonderful way to expend all that little boy energy, especially on rainy days.